danger.
this should become interesting.
they’re coming to kill us all.
fear and panic.
locker room mentality.
jock strap boot lickers.
look on the bright side.
here we go at last.
over the hills around the bend and far away.
back where we belong – and those of our kind.
this is a joke, right?
remember how we have forgotten.
bored eternal gods playing with a reality simulation machine.
spinning the wheels.
or there are no gods and we are doing this all to ourselves.
our stupidity.
or whatever else it might be.
we still don’t know.
or a mad god laughing screaming alone in the void inside his head.
we seem always to be the last to know.
semi-quasi-delusional.
broken by the world as we experience it happening to us.
feeling quite negative.
suicide by cigarette.
he needs to clean the cat box.
and he does so.
and checks the mail.
exponential evolution.
changing our minds every moment.
undecided.
unconvinced.
we proceed along pathless paths going nowhere (now here) anywhere anyway we come and go as we please.
in our heads outta our minds.
among the left behinds when shit hits the fan.
but for the mind shift/ship spiriting us through whatever or not.
let go and hang on.
no way around it, baby.
he puts out a cigarette.
he hits the inhaler.
he tends to the dishwasher.
then takes out the recycling watching clouds moving changing overhead during a break in the rain.
and later it’s medication time.
and more coffee and another toke and another cigarette.
he coughs and hacks.
he decides to draw.
in a while he gets tired of that.
pet the kitty.
people wanting more and more ending up with less and less the more it is divvied up among the billions of us fuckers.
what did we expect?
and billions will need to die.
that is according to the calculated predictions of rationalogic soothsayers for the perfect world to come into being.
separating the wheat from the chaff and all that jazz.
but he thinks about everything instead.
the amazing wonderful realization of it whatever that might entail.
he don’t care if it’s actually real or only in his mind – whatever his mind might be in that case.
and some of the wonders are terrifying while others are delightful.
the best and worst of all possible worlds.
us being under the spell of the knowledge of good and evil.
that is what we desired though we knew not what we were doing at the time.
hahaha.
that old story.
the depth of our collective soul.
everything is consciousness.
a point of bliss quite easy to attain however difficult to maintain.
but do we care?
not really.
let others enter into perpetual bliss.
what a drag.
it’s more fun and exciting riding vibrating cosmic waves of the universe we experience on every plane of our being radiating everywhere everywhen in everything.
we’re full of it.
we seem to have lost the crowd of followers as expected for everything to work as planned in with the inner continuing workings of the project.
not for everyone.
we’re boring but never bored.
complicated confusion.
it takes one to know one.
here come the marching clowns honking their horns at the pretty girls and boys.
who will be chosen for the sacrifice in this near distant world as we hope for a return to what we can understand just what the fuck is happening anymore?
whatever comes to mind again and again.
we are wrong.
it’s never quite right.
try it again.
he lights another cigarette.
he feels guilty as anyone else is accused as being.
thoughts in his head about cruel and unusual punishments.
where does it go from here?
along the twists and turns of the wayward path.
here we go.
we witness so many possibilities come and go.
everything is possibility.
a river of possibilities.
people who want one size to fit all – or more aptly for all to fit one size.
when confusion is among their ranks.
action/reaction yin yang thing turning around around in our heads.
we sing and dance.
we fall down.
we laugh.
and as we prattle on la-dee-da-dee-da.
it becomes so much noise in our head.
noise that seems to be confounding to others but we’re immune.
we’re used to it since when we were born into it.
and the idea of some sorta über-ape god of everything decreeing eternal punishment for those disobedient and disloyal doesn’t jive with his idea that a god of everything would be above such petty behavior.
it seems too much like human pettiness to him.
he could be wrong.
he could be right.
but most are just fine with it – as long as it’s not them who are damned.
they twist themselves into pretzels trying to follow the rules.
there is only one rule – peace, love and understanding.
but this is a far away dream.
the others laugh at us.
we are fools.
we should believe in war and victory.
all hail.
god is on our side.
we choose not knowing what the fuck.
is that free will – in ignorance?
and fate takes what we choose and bends it to its will regardless.
we are puppets on strings.
and so why should we care?
we have been led along on this dead end path into tomorrow which is today.
the moment here now.
we look around and see nothing but destruction and waste.
find the beauty in that.
there is beauty in everything.
it lies in the context of meaning of our perceptions.
how we choose to experience.
how we feel with whatever active chemicals are in our system at the time.
where are we?
what are we?
what is our origin?
i am?
like knowing that does us any good in this world.
billions of those of us who are i am.
a universe that is i am.
gods that are i am.
and none of us seem to be able to get along.
fighting all the time.
fighting about what?
but we perceive good and evil and judge the world accordingly.
judge each other.
judge the universe and the gods.
judge ourselves.
where is one without the other?
what good exists without evil and vice versa too?
and all that jazz about that.
the context of meaning of our perceptions.
in our minds everything has meaning of some sort.
from meaningful to meaningless and then some.
from individual to collective meaning.
the electro-circus is on.
death to the infidels.
birth life death.
an entanglement of serpents swallowing tails.
an influence of moods.
heartbreak hotel down and out on easy street.
walk softly and carry a big stick.
that’s the way to go in the world.
a big stick of truth upside the head.
that is all many seem able to understand as having any meaning and purpose.
but truth comes in many flavors.
we taste each one.
multi-gods or uni-god?
another question that comes to mind once in a while.
he chooses neither/both as is his custom to do so.
sitting on a fence we muse about possibilities we might imagine being.
dreamers of worlds.
spellbound.
watch out for that tree.
the troubles of the world by our own doing or not.
to be thinking about everything throughout.
we are thankful for those who take care of our needs and wants.
most of who are paid for doing so.
but then so are we to do what we do.
gazing out the window at an overcast morning.
another cigarette.
pet the kitty.
a blue car driven by a neighbor guy with long beard rolls by.
the world seen with the naked eye as we experience it.
can we trust anything else?
we have indirect experience through various media from the accounts of others.
accounts that often enough contradict one another.
what does that prove?
out with those that oppose what truth we believe in.
off with their heads.
this means war.
or we accept that our experiences of everything is different.
perhaps investigate why.
or how much similar they are.
or ignore it long enough till it goes away.
this is maybe kinda our truth sorta is that all truths are different and follow their own logic.
most truth is truth of meaning.
yet it’s become all mixed up and difficult to determine what’s what and what’s not what.
entangled with one another trading ideas back and forth among them.
changing them if need be to suit our own purpose.
the layers and layers and layers.
not to mention out and out lies and bullshit being promoted as truth.
we try to be clear but what ultimately influences us and motivates us is not always too easy to unravel.
a lifelong puzzling task we are assigned at birth.
and the sun bursts forth after days of heavy rain flooding parts of the city.
he nukes up a leftover eggroll.
another cigarette.
he needs to go get supplies.
to us all truth is theory.
with theory we can have our doubts.
with theory it may change as new information is available to us.
but though even with theory much is invested by those in authority reluctant to change as they have made it their career with high positions to protect.
and la-dee-da with that.
we have no career nor position but our sanity to protect.
we are mad and welcome to it.
we are amateurs at everything else.
but we try it on anyway for our own to imagine and reason.
we have found the freedom to do that as much as possible given the circumstances of the situation we find ourselves in.
putting out a cigarette he hits the inhaler.
to everyone we are wrong.
they are right.
they are the many.
we are few and far between.
but perhaps not.
buncha freaks.
he goes gets supplies.
another cigarette.
communication is sketchy.
lottsa distrust among us.
too many people shouting.
too many people with agendas.
just leave us alone.
alone with a turkey and cheese sandwich and a ginger ale.
what’s all the fuss about everything?
survival.
many of us are being exterminated – individuals, collectives, cultures, ideas and such.
homogenized mush is taking over.
thinking will not be prohibited but to become obsolete.
telepathic sameness.
the vision becomes clearer as it approaches.
as the possibilities emerge outta the shadows.
the hand of fate weaves.
we are caught in the turning tide.
no one to help us now.
the collective will has been moved against us from every side.
the mood is crazy tense.
get with the program or else.
die.
space city.
thinking about everything we think.
another toke after a brief nap.
vague undisciplined thoughts abounding like popping popcorn.
erupting like squeezing a pimple onto a mirror.
that sea breeze across the deck of the ship of fools smoothly sailing.
is every day today?
sophomoric understanding perhaps.
jokes of the future?
what future?
there is but one future all futures must lead to – the future of peace, love and understanding.
to be naked unafraid.
a certain harmony no discord may disturb but is calmed by it.
and all that groovy kinda stuff.
as if it could ever be true.
not by us.
not as we are as yet.
our hearts filled with vengeance.
the hearts of our anthropomorphic gods filled with vengeance.
and let’s not forget about their greed.
the dance of stars.
childhood.
excitement in our hair.
a fever.
a blind rat in a hat.
imagine that.
abracadabra.
be.
everything is fluctuation waves across the universe from infinitesimal to infinite.
vibrations of spacetime plenum singularity thing.
on/off.
surf’s up.
um… (hello, baby – goodbye).
neoflesh ageless wonders of immortality devised.
injections of synthetic life.
but that putrid smell.
for us is death into the everlasting.
or not.
what does it matter?
/// god and anti-god battling until the end of time.
somehow this makes sense to someone.
we are judged either for or against either one of them.
but we sit on a fence and die laughing our fool heads off.
what a joke this has become.
a faceless caricature of itself groping blindly in the light.
we have pity – with a grin.
they turn their backs to us.
a familiar sight to see.
how long does this go on?
but we turn our backs as well and gaze within without at everything we are able to perceive and/or imagine at this point in our development.
it seems bleak.
our reality breaks apart like an eggshell revealing another reality in turn as an infinite progression of russian dolls.
or something like that.
we don’t know.
we hardly care.
it’s another mystery we have yet to unriddle.
too many questions arise buzzing around like flies on a corpse.
sitting in a garden – a garden of hell.
in-a-gadda-da-vida, baby.
holy smoke.
gazorbnik 