[untitled]

doctor.
driven on by our madness thinking about everything.
1 > infinity.
think about that being true for the moment.
is it?
is it not?
he burps.
to continue at a point at which when a function takes an infinite value especially in spacetime when matter is infinitely dense.
computation of events that may or may not have happened for real but in thin disguise of an ideal set in our thinking and imagination.
the ideal of it.
it can be anything.
down to 0.
from 0 to 1 in eternity.
he catches glimpses of what it must be like.
comprehension flashing in his mind.
ghosts in the rearview mirror.
everything under special circumstances according to certain given parameters programmed into the simulation machine.
an infinitely dense plenum of dead nothingness brought to life by vibrations of energy rendering it into everything that can be possible including that which is only possible being impossible.
something impossible is something.
we bend possibility to the shape of our thinking will.
we discover the limits of it “before” it becomes impossible.
just following orders.
the mandate of heaven.
bend over and salute.
he is tired.
he sleeps.

guided through realizations toward a possible state of enlightenment in our heads outta our minds.
we perceive other worlds of our fancy.
are they real?
do they need to be?
how do we judge when we are not in agreement about what reality is anyway?
reality is as it is perceived to be.
he eats some slightly stale cheez-its.
he doubts that he understands.
why should he?
it doesn’t matter in this world if anyone understands.
it only matters if we can make $$$ or not.
$$$ gives things meaning.
fuck the absurd universe.
everything has meaning we give it.
who is to tell us otherwise besides know it all wise guys?
fuck them.
to hold an object in our hand.
to call it a rock.
what other meaning does it need to have?
we have convoluted abstract metaphorical meanings beyond that which are arbitrary.
poetic license.
we think too much.
the search for some ultimate meaning to everything.
everything just is.
it is it.
the flashes of comprehension continue in his head bringing him to new understanding.
perceiving things he has no words for he can barely think about.
he understands through gazorbnik.
gazorbniking as guru jeff taught us to gazorbnik.
triggering the unconscious power of non-linear propulsion.
what has meaning for himself and no other understands.
the synchronistic syncopation of synthesizing synergy.
the process of metaschizophrenic science.
the madness.
to be entirely open to it at the risk of going insane.
but if we are insane to begin with then what’s the big deal?
to come to a realization how much he fucked up his life.
given chances he did not take that might have led him into different directions to different destinations.
oh well.
so much for that.
he followed pathless paths to their own conclusions.
to the conclusion that there are no conclusions.
none he can fathom.
everything comes and goes on and on.
endless waves on a beach.
mesmerizing.
he returns to the world still the same as it appeared before though he knows better.
it is constantly changing.
the shimmering of light and shadow.
he feels he may have all the pieces he needs but is unsure how they might go together.
he is an idiot that way.
he farts.
he is frightened and timid.
he hopes for the best and expects the worst.
everything falls somewhere in-between.
it’s all too confusing.
he finds his own place in it for himself.
to do his own thing.
to make it up for himself.
to maintain his individuality throughout for whatever that might be worth.
he is allergic to the collective mind groupthink thing.
he breaks out in the heebee jeebees.
people make him insane.
that is the only way they can tolerate his kind for us to be insane.
but what kind is his kind?
he is alone it would seem to him.
vague notions in his head of dreams.
nothing definitive.
powerless against the others who have taken over the world.
they have successfully claimed it as their world to do as they please with it for their own gain – $$$.
the rest of us are to know our place.
he is visiting here to observe and report to the committee.
he sleeps.

he wakes and makes coffee.
a toke.
a cigarette.
more monkey business.
it’s all games.
he’s never liked games and their competitiveness one against the others.
he never knew this is life.
victory and defeat.
those above and those below.
and that whole mind set thing.
he liked being relaxed taking it easy.
time to think and dream.
they don’t care for dreamers much.
they make that very clear.
shock them out of it.
get to work.
be productive.
make us some $$$.
there must be another way for us to live our lives.
but this one is locked in place and nothing’ll budge it.
it has pushed everything else out of the way or assimilated it.
we cannot defend ourselves against it.
if we do we become like them.
if your aim is to conquer and dominate the earth then they have it down.
the perfect machine.
we all work for the machine.
no one thinks to unplug the damn thing.
unplug it from our minds where it gets its source of energy.
it runs on our belief in it and its power.
we bow to it.
he is done with it as much as he can be.
he still needs $$$ to go to the company store for supplies.
it is fortunate he is provided with some for nothing but staying outta the way and not cause trouble.
the gods protect fools.
the same thing over and over each day.
a rat in a maze.
but we transcend that noise.
we circumvent it as we are able but it is everywhere.
we cannot live in this world and not be part of it.
we are all part of the problem.
our individual greed combined into collective greed.
the masses wanting more more more.
the elite at the top wanting all all all.
and so on.
what do we want our reality to be?
what do we cause our reality to be?
pita and hummus.
another cigarette.
an earth-like planet is supposedly discovered.
let’s go conquer it.
“employ” the inhabitants and grab all their resources.
think of the $$$ we’ll make.
before they do it to us.
unless they already have (?).
the explanation is /// not clear.
it never is.
it is never intended to be but to raise more questions than answers.
to believe in some literal truth unchanging through all seasons.
what in the whole universe is that?
an idealized myth passed on through the generations people unquestioningly believe.
even science is not untouched by it.
they operate on the same principle seeking to discover where it may be hidden.
change is unchanging.
everything remains the same – or similar enough to itself in flux.
the world is melting before our eyes once we learn to perceive.
this moment is unique never to be repeated.
but a close approximation to it follows in the next.
flowing river to the sea.
Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|Y|
positive thoughts.
surf’s up.
ride the cosmic waves to destinations unknown.
this is living life for whatever that might be worth.
it is glorious.
he tries to believe but he is always filled with doubt.
but doubt is good, isn’t it?
until we become paralyzed by it maybe.
he doubts everything.
he does not know what to choose.
he lets it ride.
he burns his thumb lighting up the peace pipe.
he scrubs the bathtub.
he is trying to enjoy the day with whatever and whatnot.
an aging hippie walks down the street.
there’s a few of them in the park.
0

1
he wonders silly things about everything.
a black swan swimming gently along across a mirror pond trailing rippling wake.
creating sustaining destroying – transforming.
it wills itself into existence.
why not?
existing without beginning nor end.
it continues here now.
was is will be.
someone mowing their lawn.
weird world yet it makes a kinda irrationalogic sense if we choose to think that way or choose to use rationalogic to make sense of it.
or something somewhere down the middle.
or something like that and then some and so on.
monkey in the middle where everything gets mixed up.
a cup of tea.
mean mr. mustard.
time frame reflex underling frothing mind.
dimwit dogmatic darling dada doo-doo.
salò salamander.
discrete distinctions surmised by the diabolical heavenly host as sirens pierce the aire.
another cigarette.
a trembling hand.
teeth clenched grin.
spin, baby, spin.
hold on.
let it ride.
this is our chosen random fate.
ah-choo.
flummoxed florescent fidgeting fearless flocks of fools bound for glory as rainbows guide their way.
a toke.
coughing hacking.
being here now.
with everything everywhere everywhen everyone possible.
so happy together.

damnation salvation tickling our bones.
this is what it is like to be this way.
we take it as it comes.
making spaghetti.
his brain is spaghetti twisted tangled noodles.
butter and garlic and parmesan.
another cigarette.
he eats and sleeps.

1 > infinity.